Great Financial Decisions in DelMoniq History #2 - Moving to a Safer Neighborhood

This minorly ties in with Decision #1, but not obviously and not directly.

Picture it... crappy neighborhood Fall 2008. (Gold Girls reference, sorry, my gay is showing)....

Anyway, when I moved cross-country in 2005, I knew that I wasnt moving into the greatest of cities or the greatest of neighborhoods in said city. But it was good enough, the place was nice and affordable, and I could take public trans (or walk) to work.

Over my first three years here, I saw the neighborhood slowly decline. The people on my street (more importantly my building and neighbors owned by the same people) were moving away, and apartments were vacant for a long time. The people moving in were not of the same caliber as before. People around my age and situation (grad/med school types) were moving out and poorer families with many children were moving in.

Graffiti appeared on the back of our house. Cars in the back lot were broken into. The landlords put up a fence (it helped some, but was kinda retarded as it didnt actually enclose anything). A car was parked across the street for over a week with no one attending it, and eventually, all the windows were busted out of it. Turns out the car was stolen and abandoned on our street.

One night last October, I was playing video games and chilling out at home, and I heard shouting outside. I looked out the window, and saw a car parked in the middle of the street and two guys shouting at each other. I sat back down and played more games. And then, I heard it. Five or six very loud gunshots right outside my house. I looked out the window and saw one of the guys running off down the street.

I grabbed my phone and called 911. Moments later, police and fire trucks were there. I never really learned what happened that night. No one was killed on my street. But the seed had been placed... it was time to move. The police action took hours. People were yelling, police investigated. I heard one woman shout: Oh my god! Thats my sisters car! What the fuck? What happened?.

The next morning, I told my carpool what happened, and one of my friends responded, with oh just last week so and so told me that someone was shot and killed outside her house. That was a block away at the other end of my street!

That morning, I was on the phone with my landlord trying to get out of my lease. They understood. I had just signed a new lease two weeks earlier, so they were sad, but they did let me out of the lease. I promised to be out by December 1.

What followed was a month of hunting for apartments. That was so NOT easy. Maybe my standards are too high? Maybe this city is not that good in general? Eventually, I found a place that I liked; however, I (again) missed warning signs.

I was so focus on getting out of the ghetto and into a decent place, that I missed a few things. Anyway, I did see the apartment, but it was after dark and most of the lights in the place were burned out. As devils advocate, there are no ceiling lights in most of the apartment. But still, I should have insisted on revisiting in the daytime. But I liked the location and the layout, and they would take my cats. So I said I would apply. The rent was a bit more than I wanted to pay, and I did try to get him to come down on the deposit. But he said he wouldnt if I had the cats. UGH.

Anyway, what followed was a month of drama. Where I had rented apartments before (in a different state), there are very strict laws in place that landlords and tenants MUST follow. And everything is very well standardized and thought out. NOT HERE. First off, what I didnt realize at the time, was that I was dealing with a rental company and NOT the landlord. Their only goal is to rent the property for the landlord, collect their commission, and wash their hands of the whole thing. So, when I saw the apartment, I said it was dirty and needed to be cleaned. The rental agent told me that the landlord would have the place cleaned and painted in time for move in. And I agreed.

I had a meeting to sign the lease, but they didnt have the keys. So, I paid money and had NOTHING to show for it. The next day, I got the keys. But it was not ALL of the keys. I was missing a mailbox key and the key to balcony door (which is double keyed, so until I had a key it could not be LOCKED). After several run arounds with the rental people, I finally go in touch with the landlord. And he insisted that the rental people had all the keys. After assuring him that they did not have all the keys, I had to meet with him at his office (an OB/GYN office, very uncomfortable) during the work day to compare my keys with his keys. Turns out he had some keys that he didnt know what they were, and they were my missing keys.

Anyway, I drive up to check on the place during the day (weeks after I was told the place would be cleaned), and it wasnt. Nothing had been done. I talked with the landlord, and he said If I knew it had to be cleaned, I would have charged more for the deposit. What the fuck!?! That charge should have been made against the pigs that moved out of here.

Anyway, I told him that it didnt matter, because I had already rented a truck to move the next day. So on moving day, I rented a carpet shampooer and my friend (the compulsive cleaner) shampooed and vacuumed and scrubbed while us boys moved boxes from the truck.

So, the financial part come in here. At the same time that Im looking for a new place to live, I get my October 2008 paycheck, and I find that it is $1000 LESS than it had been before. Turns out, on my 3rd anniversary, I got reclassified in the system and now taxes are being deducted when they were not before. Well, shit. I needed that money to move! So, I had to beg money from the parents (I hate doing that), and I was able to refinance the CitiLoan and get an additional $900.

So, to recap. Moving is hard enough as it is without the landlord/rental agent being assholes. Moving is expensive enough even when your job doesnt suddenly stop 1/3 of your pay. And now, all the progress of paying $200+/month to the loan from the therapy has been washed away and theres even more debt. And I had to get money from the parents, which I had not needed to do in years.

The upside, no one is getting shot on my street, and I dont feel unsafe walking to my car after dark at home. And there is a washer and dryer in my apartment. The downside, I now have still more debt and more guilt than before. My rent is $175/month more than before and I make $1000 less/month. Plus, utilities here are more expensive, and now I have to drive to work.

I guess, in the long run, for my piece of mind the safety is most important. But I now have ZERO extra money ever. I am back to where I was financially in 2004, which was pretty shitty. I dont have mountains of credit card debt, but there is that damn CitiLoan still out there. And I have no real money in my savings accounts. I had been hoping that by 2010 things would be less bleak, but it does not appear to be turning out that way.

I am kinda very annoyed with my apartment. All the little things are now glaring blemishes. I hate my downstairs neighbors. I dont like the driving to work. And now I am 100% stuck. There is no way to get more money from the parents (especially after they helped with the vet costs in June). And I doubt that I would be able to get more money out of the CitiLoan. So, I just need to tough it out here until I get my real job in the mythological future.

And there is the added horribleness of having my friends not completely understand the situation. I used to travel 3 or 4 times each year to visit friends or family. Now, I absolutely can not do that. There is no money. I havent been on a trip for almost a year. And there are things that I would love to do. But I am living in a situation of my own creating, and I need to deal with that.

It just sucks you know. On paper, moving was a BAD decision, but is the safety issue and piece of mind (however how small) worth the added financial stress? I dont know. Probably. I really dont think that I could handle that neighborhood now. But it just sucks that I had to ruin my finances to get out of there and that I am not 100% satisfied with my apartment.

Overall, I declare this situation NEUTRAL.

It's Tuesday... Where'd my money go?

I realize that I intend to do this post on Sundays, but my parents were here for the weekend. So, I'm doing it on Tuesday instead. That makes this "week" long and next "week" short. Oh well, it's blog, I'll do whatever I want. Deal with it. =)

June 8 - 16, 2009

$7.01 - Walgreens - Drinks for at work. Grr. It's a dirty habit, but I need an afternoon drink at work. But, I got $2 cash for buying a drink for a friend that didn't go to the store, so really, it's only $5. We'll balance out the cash at the end.

$9.28 - Walgreens - UGH. Snacks and drinks for work. Seriously? I'm a snack-whore, I guess.

$23.44 - Groceries - Reasonable.

$15.60 - 7-11 - Gas for the car.

$13.31 - 7-11 - A drink for the road and two packs of cigarettes. UNACCEPTABLE! I'm shaming myself right now. Really? I didn't need to spend $10.49 on DEATH! Plus, now I know that I can get my drink from the grocery store at 5/$5 instead of paying $2.19 at 7-11. That's way better! Live and learn.

$31.13 - PetCo - My cat's not been feeling well, so this is extra cat expenses, but worth it if he'll just poop already.

$10.45 - Ikea - Probably unnecessary. $2 on lions (I would have bought more, but I only found 4 in the bin). Lions are a really bad habit I should break. They're only $0.49 each, but seeing as how I have about 400 of them... I've spent roughly $200 on little stuffed lions, and that's retarded! I also got some more hangers (8 hangers for $4, not a bad deal), but I've been living without these extra hangers until now, so I probably could have gotten by without them. But I'll use them. This is what happens when the driver of the carpool wants to stop places on the way home. I have no impulse control. I'd have spent $20 on lions, if I could have found 40 of them. Retarded!!

But that's it for Debit card transactions. Not bad for 9 days. ($110.22) Okay adding it up, it sounds like a ridiculous amount of money to spend on things, when really only $70.17 were necessary. I could have not spent $40.05. Again, something to work on.

Now for the cash. Per last week, I had $7 cash.

Cash In:
$45 - ATM withdrawl
$2 - from JP for a drink
$5 - from mother for airport parking

Cash Out:
$6.50 - Monday Lunch
$7 - Tuesday Lunch
$3 - Tuesday Drink ($2.33 $0.67 into change bucket at home)
$6 - Wednesday Lunch
$7.50 - Thursday Lunch
$4.50 - Thursday Airport Parking
$4 - Monday parking at work
$2.50 - Monday Airport Parking
$7 - Tuesday Lunch
$2 - Tuesday Ikea hot dog and drink

Cash in hand now: $3

TOTAL CASH IN: $52
TOTAL CASH OUT: $50

I should have only $2 in cash, and I know that I paid to park at work on Sunday (I don't remember how much). So, I'm off somewhere. I'm still not used to keeping track of cash).

TOTAL MONEY IN: $107.36
TOTAL MONEY OUT: $244.64

The totals reflect additions and subtractions from today's mail, and those transactions aren't listed above (mainly because I wasn't sure where to list them. (+$55.36 and -$84.42)

Seriously, no more frivolous spending. **kicks self in face** But really, June is more about keeping track of things so I know how and where to change things for July and the future.

History of My World - Part II

I was just sitting on the deck with the laptop, headphones, and a cigarette (yes, quitting is still a goal) trying to get comfortable to start Part II of my financial history. The rain is nice and relaxing; however, it's just too chilly to get comfy outside to focus. Now, I'm snuggled in my bed with blankets and Shamus the Bedtime Whale. That's spelled like Shamu but pronounced like Seamus (an Irish dude's name). The Captain just joined me on the bed, and that can only mean one thing: it's time to get serious about blogging. So without further ado...

Part II: The College Years (mid-1990s; Age 18-22)

Unlike the majority of people I went to high school with, I decided not only to go to college but to go to college and NOT live at home. This without a doubt can be counted as one of the best decisions I have made in my life. It's just one of those things. Being raised to be independent, I needed to get out on my own. I moved out of my parents place, and really, never went back.

College was a fantastic time in my life with many, many personal discoveries and life decisions. Most of the talk of college isn't really appropriate here, and I think that most people that go away to college have similar experiences on some level. It really is about getting out on your own, meeting people, gaining knowledge (both book learning and life learning). Of course, what I'm going to focus on is my financial learning, which save for a hard-earned C in Economics class my senior year is real life learning. Unfortunately, the real learning for me happened in retrospect years later.

Right off the bat, I have to say that NONE of this would have been possible without my parents. My story would have been very, very different had they not made the choices for me that they did. During the early years (discussed yesterday), my parents were socking away money for college for both me and my brother. Having grown up and done the college thing themselves, they knew that my brother and I needed the college fund as well as a college education. I got a small scholarship that paid a portion of my tuition (as long as I maintained a 3.2 average). The rest of everything was paid for by my parents. They told me several times that the didn't want me distracted having to worry about money for school or having a job and wearing myself out. The ultimate goal was for their son to get an education and join the world with no debt from school. I will be forever grateful for this, and I don't think that I really thought about this much during my time at school. Unfortunately, I don't think I fully expressed my appreciation to my parents for their hard work behind the scenes of my education. I'm going to have to rectify this.

Even today, I'm not entirely sure how my parents managed to pay for four years of a private university for me (and my brother). But this is what I do remember. I had offered to take out student loans to help out, but they insisted that I not do that. Instead, they paid my tuition, room, board, books, etc. on their Visa card. It seems kind of insane to do such a thing, but they had a scheme. Their Visa card gave them points for air miles and miscellaneous things, which they needed and used. Then, they paid off the balance in full each month from the college fund, which netted them very few finance charges. Pretty, smart I think.

Anyway, how this relates to me, I really had nothing to worry about financially in my first two years of school. I lived in the dorm and had a meal plan through the university. My parents paid for bills and supplies. And then there was The Credit Card. Given to me again to cover emergency expenses, groceries, trips to Target, and what not. Also, my minuscule savings account from high school had money place in it for when cash was needed. Looking back on it now, this was the perfect set up for me -- had I not been an ungrateful brat at the time.

Quickly I developed abusing schemes involving The Credit Card. The mini Post Office at the local grocery store sold money orders that could be paid for by credit card. I joined a mail order CD club, and paid for my CDs with money orders bought with The Credit Card. Receipts from which were marked as from the grocery store. So, all the parents knew was that I was buying groceries, which was an approved use of The Credit Card. I do believe that sometimes, I'd use The Credit Card to buy groceries for friends in exchange for cash, as well. Eventually, the mini-PO stopped selling money orders on credit cards and that scheme ended.

At the end of my freshman year, I was approached by one of my professors about doing some summer research. Faced with the facts that (1) I didn't want to go back to my parents' house for the summer, (2) I really loved science, and (3) I wanted/needed extra money, this was a win-win-win situation. My parents loved the idea as well, and thus I started spending summers at school working in the lab. During the school year, I got class credit and I was paid in the summers, and I never had to live with my parents again. That first summer, I had to move out of the dorm and into a house with five strangers (I sublet a room from a guy I found on a message board for the summer). I reiterate that this was another great decision. Not only did I gain work experience and stay away from "home", I met one of my best friends of my whole life that first summer. We're still friends to this day. And seeing as how I was living at school for the summer, learning and working, my parents were happy to pay the rent for the summer. My pay check paid for me to do fun things or buy groceries and stuff.

The next year was back into the dorm, and really nothing of too much consequence financially. Other than to say that sophomore year is when the smoking really kicked into high gear. I dabbled at parties and social things my freshman year. But that second year, it was apparent that I was addicted. I'd go out and talk with friends in the 10 minutes between class and smoke. I'd smoke on the way to class, on the way home, on a break from research, and pretty much whenever I got the chance. It never really occurred to me at the time that this could end up being a huge mistake. It was cool, I felt cool, and it was something that my parents definitely would not approve of. The Credit Card was often use to buy cigarettes at the grocery store. I distinctly remember when the price of cigarettes was jacked up in one swoop during college. All of sudden they were $2.50/pack! I thought of quitting, but didn't. Now, $2.50 sounds like nothing as I pay about $6.75/pack now. What a waste.

Moving on, junior year, I moved out of the dorms and into an apartment with friends. My parents thought that since they were paying for the dorm and meal plan and rent and groceries were cheaper that they'd pay for it as well. Looking back, I really was a spoiled brat and didn't appreciate how easy I had it. This makes me sad now, and I wish I could go back in time and kick my own ass. Junior year was also the time when I was introduced to my own credit cards for the first time. Again, the thought was, I'll have a "real job" later and can pay it all off in the future with no problem. I understand that this is a common thought for people, but it's oh so horribly wrong. Nevertheless, I dove head on into consumer debt. By junior year, I was getting regular lectures about the proper use of The Credit Card, and there were many fights between my mother and I on the subject. I was working on not using this card, and since I had several (yes, several) of my own, there wasn't too much of a problem. Quickly, my tiny credit limits were maxed out (~$500-1000 each over 3 or 4 cards), and I was stuck. So, I'd have to use The Credit Card again, which would lead to another lecture/fight. It really was a downward spiral.

And what, you might ask, did a 19/20 year old man-boy buy on credit? I don't even remember. Computer games, porn, clothes, alcohol, cigarettes. NOTHING that I still have now (with the exception of one porn magazine kept for sentimental reasons). That's the awful truth. I got in huge debt for really no good reason, except for the fact that I wanted things.

My senior year was a bit more of the same. I moved to a different apartment with different friends (my friends from the junior year place were no longer my friends after living with them for about 3 months). I kept spending and paying minimums. I started my VHS collection (DVDs were still years away). I had my part-time employment through my major department, which paid for some minimal spending money. My junior year, I got a second part-time job at a local government research lab, and this helped the money in-flow some. But at this point in things, I was already at the point where I was paying everything into the cards and then having to use the cards to buy things.

Unfortunately, I learned nothing about my personal finances during college. It's really only been in the last 6-7 years that I've learned my lesson, and even today, I'm still trying to dig myself out of the mess I created 15 years ago.

After graduation, I decided to move across the country and go to graduate school. My birthday just happened to be around graduation time, so as a combination birthday/graduation present, my parents bought me a car, paid for my move to California, and helped me get settled in my new place. This was all given to me with the explicit words that I was now "on my own". My brother was going to be starting college soon, and he was going to get the same treatment I did. This meant that there was no way they could pay for me. Being 22 years old, I was fine with that.

Now officially on my own, started the third part of my story: graduate school -- a story for another day.

Lessons Learned Part II: The caveat here is that I didn't learn these lessons during this time. It was only on dealing with the future that was created did I learn.

(1) Credit Cards are good, if you can manage them correctly. I thought this was the case and that I just wasn't doing it right.
(2) My parents were awesome, and I was very lucky. I don't think that I really learned this completely until tonight.
(3) Smoking is expensive, but manageable, because it's cool.

Next Up: Part III - Graduate School